Figuratively and literally.
Faith stretched so far I think it may snap in two.
I don't know how to handle all of this. But He does. And I can absolutely feel Him and His peace. It's like someone else is taking over...well it is, isn't it? When I'm weak He is strong. And boy am I glad He is cause right now I'm not.
I had our pre-travel consultation with Dr Hachen of CHOP yesterday and it was great. One thing she shared with me has helped me understand why it will be so very important to not let people hold Sophia when we first come home. Honestly, I've had trouble with that. I thought it was only for bonding purposes but she shed new light on the reason why. She told me Sophie will be shell shocked. We know that. But what I didn't realize is that for a while she will be afraid someone else is going to take her away from her new life. That hurts me to the core y'all. So we've got to do everything we can to make sure she feels secure. So please bear with us as we make the transition when we come home. It'll be hard, but it's simply what we've got to do. She's more than likely never seen people who look like us so when she sees all the new Americans in her life, it'll take time for her little mind to understand. But she will....by God's grace she will.
Adoption is wonderful, but is also very hard. We've prepared, prayed and waited for this for years. But she has not. She has no idea what's about to happen. As glorious as Gotcha Day will be, it'll also be very hard on our daughter. We are taking her away from everything she has ever known. And although we all know it is what is best for her, she doesn't know that. The grieving may last for months, it may not. This is the reality of adoption. It's what we have to be prepared for and we are as well as we can be. When we first started this process I had no idea how hard this would be. Friends that had adopted told me, warned me...it's not for the faint of heart. They were right. It's not. But I wouldn't change a thing. I have grown in Him through this, and have fallen more in love with Him through this as well. I've begun to understand His crazy love for us His kids! What a gift He has given me through it all. To scratch the surface of understanding His passion for us. Pure bliss.
When I am weak, He is strong. He is my Hero.